Nine of Wands (upright & reversed)

This card suggests that they are intrigued, interested in you but very cautious. As the two of you haven’t known each other for long, it’s likely they have their guard up due to a past relationship which involved conflict and left battle scars. It could also mean that even in the early stages of your connection, there was some kind of obstacle that had to be overcome and they are pausing for a moment to take a breath. They might be afraid of getting too close to fast. There is definitely potential for romance here. However, right now they are eyeing the possibility of being with you skeptically. But they are there, still showing up, waiting to see what will unfold.

They’re still committed to you and the relationship, but they may be feeling guarded. Something between you – whether recent or long ago – has left them on edge, as if they’re bracing for the next hit. They still care and they’re not walking away, but they’re tired. Maybe there have been arguments, disappointments or there’s simply too much pressure at the moment. They’re watching closely to see when things will settle down. There’s love here and a willingness to show up and fight. But there’s also a deep need for feeling safe and reassurance. They haven’t given up, they’re just trying to catch their breath and preserve what’s left of their energy.

They still think about you, but with hesitation. Your history together likely involved conflict or a non-mutual breakup. Even if there’s a part of them that wonders “what if,” there’s another part that’s protecting itself from being hurt again. It could be that they haven’t fully healed from what happened between you, or they’re unsure if things would really be different this time around. They possibly care more than they let on, but they’re approaching the idea of reconnecting with skepticism. They’re not fully turning away, but they’re keeping their distance, waiting to see if this could ever feel safe again. If you’re hoping to reconcile: it’s possible, but wounds will have to be tended to.

Here are some of the traditional interpretations of the Nine of Wands in love and relationships when it shows up reversed:

• they feel like giving up
• they feel it’s everyone else’s fault and there’s nothing they can do to change the situation (victim mindset)
• they’re experiencing a complete burnout: mentally and physically
• they are pushing others away
• emotional walls have been building up
• they are very defensive
• they feel resentful and bitter
• hopelessness

Did you know that many professional tarot readers choose to not work with reversed cards? And you don’t have to either! Read my article about “Why I don’t read reversed cards” here.

There is absolutely no right or wrong way of going about this, and including reversed cards in your readings can absolutely make sense. However, especially if you’re just starting out, know that many well established tarot professionals don’t feel the need to include them or assign special meaning to them.